Posted in Art, Entertainment

World War of the Blogs III

From the Blog of Revelations (Armadillon)

The Six Seals of the Blog Hypothesis:

The first three seals are the three sea lions of the Apostrophe:

First Seal – a white sea lion

As the first seal was opened, Nikola Tesla, wrote: “And I looked, and behold, a white sea lion did not ‘read‘ his post and he went out conjuring and to be conjured!”

Second Seal – a yellow sea lion

When the second seal opened, Nikola noted: “While this sea lion did read his post it was not granted to the one who posted the post that it should be ‘liked‘ and that other bloggers should run from his post; and there was given to him a great sword to slay these cowardly bloggers!”

Third Seal – a pink sea lion

As for the pink sea lion, Nikola said, “So the one did read and like the post, but it was granted unworthy of a ‘comment‘ of any kind. I looked, and behold, a pinkish sea lion and he who sat on it had a pair of scissors in his hand. And I heard a voice in the midst of his six following bloggers saying, “A bottle of Coke for a denarius, and three slices of pizza for a denarius; and ‘first do not harm’ is the motto of the American Medical Association! So just be merry and get oiled with wine!

All’s well and good, but what then is the meaning of the last three seals?

Only The Shadow Knows for Sure!

Posted in animals, Royalty

The Earl of Cattshire Commons!

I am Frederick Felix Feline, 9th Earl of Cattshire Commons

My litter box does not stink! I even have my own Royal Pooper!

So bow when you address me and always show me the respect I am due: or I’ll scratch your eyes out!

Look deeply into my eyes if you dare!

Many small animals have to their despair!

And I can surely scare the shite out of any dog, any day!

As for you, have you ever seen the movie, The Incredible Shrinking Man?

Posted in animals, Art, Prose

50 Shades of Cat Litter!

A repost: but this time with more feeling!

I have this theory that dogs were originally from Mars and cats from Venus!

Dogs are cute and cuddly as pups and become slobbering, tail-wagging fools as adults. And we all know how much men love slobbering, wagging, foolish tails.

Cats, however, start out as cute, fluffy balls of joy. But as adults they seem self-centered. Like … I don’t give a damn, ‘kiss me babe’ egomaniacs.  They’re still cute. But it’s like they really could care less!

So a dog may be the ideal companion for a man; and cats, maybe sadly, often the ideal love for a woman. 

You see, I feel that woman pick men like they pick their cats. 

It’s Fifty Shades of Cat Litter!

For men, it’s may be more basic and mostly instinctual:

Five Shades of Doggy Bags and Chinese Take-Out!

This is all becoming too confusing for me as a sexist old fool. 

Maybe, I should consider adopting is a Guinea Pig to keep in the family!