I Liked You the Way You ‘Used To Be!’

You ‘used to be’ nice.Just a regular guy. But you’ve changed. You see! I don’t know you anymore. You’ve gone away. Yes! You’re not a regular guy. Like you ‘used to be!’ Anyhow! Anywhere! Anymore! You see! ************ Brilliant! Really!? My wife just gave me the lyrics for my next song. Wait a minute. I…… Continue reading I Liked You the Way You ‘Used To Be!’

Yes! I Had Do-Do In My Pants!

Over You! So I stripped stark naked walked the neighborhood sans shoes pounding a drum-de-drum. I really had nothing else to lose! But someone called the law even though I was senile and having a ball! Now! My trial date is coming soon. And at that trial I’m surely Going To Moon!

You Speak Chinese!? 你會說中文嗎?

Is it true, you’re fluent in Chinese? Yes! Manikin! A much maligned modern dialect spoken mainly in Guangdong and Guangxi Province Chinese Restaurants and Department Stores mainly between 9am and 5pm China Standard Time, on alternating Thursdays, mostly! ************ 人體模型! 主要在廣東省和廣西省百貨商店使用的一種備受詬病的現代方言主要是在中國標準時間上午9點到下午5點之間,週四交替播放! Réntǐ móxíng! Zhǔyào zài guǎngdōng shěng hé guǎngxī shěng bǎihuò shāngdiàn shǐyòng de yīzhǒng…… Continue reading You Speak Chinese!? 你會說中文嗎?

Hoo-Ah … Hoo-Ah … Are You Looking At Me!?

Try as I might My Sicilian temper Sometimes makes me A scary, frightful sight! Al Pacino, Robert De Nero and me Three basically the same age & DNA mix with Al Pacino And “ Are you looking at me?” From “Taxi Driver” “Hoo-Ah … Hoo-Ah”. From “Scent of a Women!” It’s me You looking at…… Continue reading Hoo-Ah … Hoo-Ah … Are You Looking At Me!?

Bees Are So …… 🐝🐝🐝

Bees are so bee-utiful to me 🐲🎶 Inspired by a Robin🧬of all things! Bees are so bee-utiful to me 👹🎵 In that tree 🎄… can’t you see?…👀 They’re everything I’ve prayed for 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼 They’re everything I need 🆘🚼♥️🎶 Bees are so bee-u-ti-ful 💄💋🤡🎵 to meeeeeeee…🐝..prttthhhhhhpt💨

Confidential Cover-Up: A Bada Bing ‘a’ Bada Boom Boom Boom!

Somewhere in the suburbs of New York, Northern New Jersey and/or a Hole near you; maybe lie the remains of Jimmy Hoffa and a fair share of Mafia hits and misfits circa the 1970s and onward. For those who don’t want to be found … For those with something to hide ………. For those ………… Continue reading Confidential Cover-Up: A Bada Bing ‘a’ Bada Boom Boom Boom!

Nothin’ to Really Fear!

But ant-fear itself! 😲🐜🐜🐜🐜🐜🐜🐜🐜🐜🐜🐜🐜🐜🐜 😱🐜🐜🐜🐜🐜🐜🐜🐜🐜🐜🐜🐜🐜🐜 Ants are eusocial insects of the family Formicidae, and along with related wasps and bees, belong to the order Hymenoptera. They evolved from wasp-like ancestors in the Cretaceous period, about 140 million years ago. They then diversified, like good insect investors, after the rise of the horrid flowering plants. They…… Continue reading Nothin’ to Really Fear!

The Noses Have It! 👃🏼👀

People! No singers! Who need Serious Rhino surgery Are the happiest And best Singers In the world 🎼🎼🎼 THIS IS NOT FUNNY! YOU HAVE A HUMONGOUS BULBOUS NOSE YOURSELF! AND YOU KNOW WHERE YOU SHOULD SHOVE IT!!! And your voice definitely sucks! Big time! ***********+ Did you know you see your nose at all times…… Continue reading The Noses Have It! 👃🏼👀

Not Guilty!!! Perry Mason’s Hot-Dog Justice!

Few actors are so closely linked to a character than Raymond Burr as Perry Mason. This long-running TV series (1957-1966) was built upon Eric Standley Gardner’s novels about a brilliant defense lawyer and his Tripple-A staff, that solved far to many crimes with off-the-wall witnesses and razor-sharp cross-examinations. It was the first mystery series to…… Continue reading Not Guilty!!! Perry Mason’s Hot-Dog Justice!

Please Forgive Me!

For I know from where your politics flow! Please Forgive Me …… For your anger and rage that never goes! Please Forgive Me …… For I know why you’re constipated and never go! Please Forgive Me …… You impersonal “I Don’t Know!” 🙌🏼🎊…🙌🏼🎊…🙌🏼🎊…🙌🏼🎊…🙌🏼🎊…? Can You Trump That!?

Sure-Fire Borsch Belt Divorce Court Humor!!!

Nothing that follows, does, in any way, apply to my wife to whom I have been happily married for almost 48 years! 🤜🏻🗣🔫************ Now, take my wife… Please!!! 🤗🤗🤗 Henny Youngman …🎻🎻🎻 ************ Really dear! Do you still love me as much as when you first met me? I have very little recollection of ever…… Continue reading Sure-Fire Borsch Belt Divorce Court Humor!!!