Posted in Comedy

Sure-Fire Borsch Belt Divorce Court Humor!!!

Nothing that follows, does, in any way, apply to my wife to whom I have been happily married for almost 48 years!

πŸ€œπŸ»πŸ—£πŸ”«

************

Now, take my wife…

Please!!! πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—

Henny Youngman …🎻🎻🎻

************

Really dear! Do you still love me as much as when you first met me?

I have very little recollection of ever having met you! πŸ˜πŸ€”πŸ€­

************

Again dear … do you truly love me?

Is the Pope Jewish?

************

Honey, is my rear end to big?

Is that a statement or a question?

************

When my wife lays around the house, she literally lays around the house!

************

Did you just whisper Pam again!? And who is Pam anyway?

Yes! Your rear end is monumental and should be deemed a National Treasure or at the very least be listed in the Guinness Book of World Records!

************

Dedicated to all the divorce lawyers out there and everywhere!

************

In recognition…

Posted in Comedy, Poetry

The War of the Ants

Inspired by KT Workman…The War

Damn ants,

everywhere they be!

You can’t win

the total war

you see.

Cause

the total mass

of all humans

is way less

than the total mass

of all those

damn ants.

Oh, woe be me!

************

However, cleaning the area with White Distilled Vinegar seems to work for me.

It’s the smell you see!

Posted in Comedy, Poetry

Rhyme All the Time!

I seem to rhyme

most of the time…

When I’m walkin’ … talkin’ …

lookin’ at Playboy gawkin’ …

When I’m reading …

post-in

or

just TV host in’ …

When I’m thinkin’ …

drinkin’ …

washin’ my Dinken…

And yes…

even

when I’m

just sitin’

in the bathroom

stinkin’…!

Posted in Comedy

My Yiddish β€˜Nonna’ With Knockers!

Definitely outdated humor…well past it’s time! As am I?

Did you know that on the 1930s/1940s Borscht Belt Comedy Circuit that Jewish women comedians were often referred to as Menstruating Minstrels?

Wait a minute!

Were there really Jewish women comedians during that ‘period!’

Wrong again Schmuck!

There was Milton Berle!

************

If opportunity doesn’t knock, build a door! … Milton Berle

To which I add…

Or add knockers…