Watch Out! The Birds Have Pooped!

If only I had known what awaited me that faithful morning when a neighbor saw me walking barefoot to begin my usual uneventful morning stroll:

Watch out! The birds have pooped!”

Yes! If only I could relive that brief moment in time and have heeded that warning instead of going on to walk where ‘no walker had gone before!’ How different my life would have transpired and be at this particilar moment in time!

Yes! Not even Stephen King in his wildest imagination and ‘coked out’ on diet coke could have penned or finger-typed such a dastardly tale as that that awaited me as I casually walked out of my 50-plus complex and onto that innocent sidewalk littered with bird droppings. Bird feces I should have taken heed of and surely avoided!

But!!! …………

To be contined after I wash my feet, put on some holeless socks, and rap my holeless belt around my dirty frayed gray shorts.

26 Comments Add yours

  1. judybarbera says:

    WOW … Sounds like it’s going to be a horror blast!!!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. If only I had known … !!!

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks for read and reblog!

      Like

  2. Haha! Giggling right now….why are stories about bird poop so funny? 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks for read!

      Yes! Bird poop is funny. But not as funny as, dare I say, squirrelly squirrel shit!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Hahaha, this is turning out to be a really sh*tty morning!!!

        Liked by 1 person

      2. To coincide with “my sh*tty life!? “

        Good title for post or TV series don’t you think?

        Liked by 1 person

      3. Do it! You should write that post lol… 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      4. Thanks! Will do! No. Will do-do! Or maybe a rehash of my Sunday Brunch posts. This time maybe, My Sh*tty Sunday Brunch!

        You are a true inspiration!

        Liked by 1 person

      5. Hahahahaha…omg this is the best comment post ever!!! 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      6. The posts are in the works…

        Liked by 1 person

      7. As Monty Burns would say in his slightly evil voice….excellent… 🙂
        I’m Looking forward to reading them.

        Liked by 1 person

      8. Coming to a post near you……

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Amy Barbera says:

    Oh No Dad!! What a mess! That sounds terrible!! You should not walk outside barefeet again! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Just the intro to a humorous horror story!? Plot unknown at this time!

      Like

  4. sarahbeth98 says:

    Fantastic writing already! Excited to read more:)

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I saw a quote or something that says if you walk outside with bare feet, you connect with nature. This is probably nature’s way of telling you it’s got some sense of humor, too.😜

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ain’t that the shits! Barefoot in the park; barefoot spooking dogs that bark; even Noah and his brood were Holy Barefoot Walkers on that 300 cubits by 30 cubits by 50 cubits Ark!

      Liked by 1 person

    2. Mentioned in new post, Barefoot on the Ark!🤪

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Halbarbera says:

      You’ve been there!? 🥺…😱…🦜💩

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Sans the worn out gray shorts.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Halbarbera says:

        🩳not grey but still worn?

        Liked by 1 person

      3. You could say that.

        Liked by 1 person

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