First diagnosed in 2013 after a homeless man got severely ill after being licked by a totally stir-fried Kentucky Finger-Licking Chicken! In this case, the stupid chicken was a-licking the phone screen!
You mean to tell me chickens have tongues!
Yes! But only The Infamous Kardashian Chicken known for it’s long protruding twitching tongue and humongous ass and breasts!
It seems the Kim the Chicken became a carrier for dreaded “iPhone Touch Disease” after some farmhand named Kris accidentally dropped his iPhone on a free-range chicken farm field. The whole range then had to be quarantined by the totally clueless U.S. Food and Drug Administration!
One of the most obvious symptoms of this disease is “overly deranged thoughts and actions” causing the ‘touched’ to do, say and write wierd shit like this post!
Need I really say more?